A politician who indulges in "puke politics".

Many politicians will do anything to beat their opponents. This letter written to a good politician on October 6, 2003 was about the man who was running against him.


Dr. Kildip Kular Liberal MPP
Queen’s Park
Toronto, Ontario

Dear Sir:

First, let me congratulate you on your election as our MPP for Malton etc.

Ironically, I was going to vote for the NDP simply because I was afraid that the Liberals would end up getting a majority and a majority government is not usually in the best interests of the people.

What made me change my mind and vote for you had nothing whatever to do with your political views or those of Mr. McGuinty. It was Raminder Gill, one of your opponents who convinced me to vote for you.

As you are aware, this man had a flyer dropped off at everyone’s home in which two of the pages were dedicated towards his attempt to destroy you by suggesting that if we voted for you, we would vote for a doctor who has been taken to task by the medical profession for some wrongdoing in the past.

As far as I am concerned, the so-called wrongdoing he alleged was not so bad that you should be condemned ten years later for it. Further, as far as I am concerned, his actions are best described as sleaze. Perhaps Arnold Schwareneger said it better when his opponent Davis tried the same smear tactic. Schwarenger referred to this tactic as “puke politics”. When Gill stooped to puke politics near the election date, I realized that he left you little time to respond. That made you the underdog. Everyone feels for the underdog. The only way I could show my contempt for Gill was to write him and tell him that his tactic would backfire and that many of us would vote for the underdog---and that is exactly what I did. You ended up with my vote for the reasons I have just given you.

But at the same time, I have concerns about your party and your leader.

Many politicians have reneged on their promises. Pierre Trudeau promised us that if he was elected, he ( not unlike his opponent, Bob Stanfield ) would not bring in wage and price controls. He did. He lied. Chretien promised us that if he was elected, he would get rid of the GST sales tax. He didn’t. He too lied. These are just two reasons why I have not voted Liberal for years.

Dalton McGuinty gained lots of support when he blasted the Conservative government for not spending enough on health care and won favor with voters by promising to spend more on health. He even promised to hire 8,000 more nurses if he was elected.
His health critic in the legislature admitted however that the hiring of these nurses won’t come about until after the SARS Commission makes its recommendation---which will probably be a year from now. She even had the audacity to say, “I can’t say that bringing staffing levels up will be the first order of business.”

Well, the wooing of Ontarians is over and we got what we didn’t want, a majority government. I sincerely hope that the Liberal provincial government doesn’t let us down like the Liberal federal government did.

The more I think about politicians, the more I am convinced that the running of government should never be left to the politicians. It’s not unlike asking rookie cops to run the local cathouse. They will keep everything in order and loose money in the process.

I remain,

Yours truly

Dahn Batchelor

The politician who said, "I didn't do it."

This is a letter sent to an obnoxious politician in the Ontario Legislature who is found wanting in politeness in the legislature. Would you want this man as your neighbour? The letter was sent to him on May 16, 2003.


John O’Toole
MPP for Durham
Ontario Legislature Buildings
Queens Park, Ontario

Dear Sir:

When I saw the picture of you standing in the Legislature with a sneering face and your middle finger stuck up in the air as if saying to the member you were addressing, “Up yours!” the first thing that came to my mind was, ‘O’Toole is another politician who has the manners of a Chicago hit man.’

But when I learned that you denied giving MPP Kormos the finger, I concluded that you are also a liar.

For the most part, no-one really likes politicians because they are out there looking after their own interests and no-one elses. We tolerate politicians because we need them to conduct the business of our province and country.

But there are two kinds of politicians that we will not tolerate and those are the crooks and the liars. You are one of the latter politicians. Unfortunately, once a politician lies, his credibility goes right down the toilet. It can never be retrieved. If you would lie about something as mundane as giving someone the bird, at what point would you not lie? Aesop said it best when he said, “A liar will not be believed even when he speaks the truth.”

I strongly suspect that your career in politics as anything other than a backbencher, is ruined.

You have served a useful purpose however in the legislature. Other legislators will remember you as the man who did it and denied it and will remember where your career went after that.

Yours truly


Dahn Batchelor

This member of parliament insulted Americans

There were a lot of complaints against this member of parliament, mostly from her consitituents who claimed that she never returned their calls. This letter went to her on November 15, 2004. Because the leader of her party was upset at her conduct, he dumpted her from the party and she was foreced to sit as an independent. She didn't make it through the next election.

Carolyn Parrish
Independent MP Hous of Commons Ottawa, Ontario

Dear Ms. Parrish:

The prime minister beat me to the punch. He removed you from his caucus before I had a chance to write him and suggest to him that he do just that.

I have been around for a great many years and I have read about MPs who acted like you but I thought that as the years went by, they were flushed down the toilet and the new ones were of a better caliber. I was wrong. I am now convinced that there will always be politicians who in their best moments, are buffoons. Politicians such as you have about as much credibility as a Nigerian scam artist ---- no-one will take you seriously unless he or she is hopelessly stupid.

I don’t care what your views are about Americans but as a member of parliament, you would have been better off directing your thoughts to matters of greater concern to Canadians and your constituents than President Bush and the American people.

You had an opportunity to serve your constituents as a member of one of the Canadian political parties but as a disgraced Independent, you will get about as much support from the government or the other political parties as a broken down bridge gets in a storm surge. For this reason, I strongly doubt that your role as a parliamentarian will go beyond your first term. Since your role as a parliamentarian has been reduced to a nothing, the honourable thing for you to do is to resign your seat so that you can be replaced by someone else who deserves the position and who can serve his or her constituents.

But judging from your conduct thus far, you will hang in there like a dirty rag old rag fluttering in the storm around you and continue to open your mouth and make sounds that to the ears of everyone who hears you, are no different that that of the breaking of wind.

Yours truly


Dahn Batchelor

Would you trust this member of parliament?

This letter was sent on June 10, 2006 to a member of the Canadian Parliament who accepted large donations from small children whose father was supporting him in his run for office again. This was against the law.

Joe Vope
Member of Parliament 520 Bronson Avenue
Ottawa, Ontario
K1R 7Y9


Dear Mr. Vope:


I am deeply concerned that a member of parliament such as yourself would accept donations from young children for his leadership race, notwithstanding the fact that the money really came from the children’s father.


As you know, there is a limit on the amount of money that private individuals can donate to politicians running for federal office, the limit being $5,400.


There is obviously a very good reason for this. If there was no limit and a multi-millionaire wanted to have a great deal of influence over the politician he has sponsored, that politician may find it very difficult to ignore the demands of the person who put him in office. It would also be conceivable that such a donor would receive preferable treatment over a constituent who doesn’t have enough money to live on and therefore couldn’t contribute to the politician’s fundraising campaign.


It is apparent to most if not all Canadians that the executive of Apotex Inc who contributed $27,000 to your coffers under the guise that it was his children, ages 11 and 14 who made the contributions, tried to go around the limitation by claiming that each of his children made the contributions. You in turn decided to thwart the intent of the limitation by accepting the money.


The actions of this executive as I see it, is tantamount to lobbying for your cooperation with respect to his business. When executives of companies begin lobbying members of parliament, it is a sure sign that their companies have lost their fight in the civil service and the cabinet. Anything that that executive or anyone else from his firm does in attempting to influence you will be looked upon by the citizens of Canada as lobbying at its worst.


It is an insult to all Canadians that both of you really thought that we are so naïve that you could pull this off and get away with it. Judging by the manner in which you tried to justify your actions, I strongly suspect that you would also accept donations from the estates of deceased pets if no one found you out.


The fact that you returned the money is evidence that you finally realize that you were wrong in accepting it in the first place.


Your political party is already reeling from the corruption that took place when it was in power and now you have the audacity to run for the leadership of the Liberal Party. It must be obvious to you by now that Canadians recognize that excellence in the ranks of political parties is as rare as excellent in command. It is a fallacy that members of parliament are of a standard that makes them excellent. Admittedly, there have been some exceptions and such men have shown the body politic that they were highly qualified for the task of leading our country. But surely, you are not going to tell us that your qualities as a politician and as a potential leader of your party are based on your excellence as a member of parliament. To do so is to insult our intelligence.


Alas, the time for your departure has come. Let me quote from Sir Allan MacNab in his May 23, 1856 speech when he addressed the Canadian members of parliament on his resignation as Canada’s Prime Minister. He said;


“If I am supported by their voice, I will feel that I am right. If condemned, I am ready to retire into private life, and, perhaps, I am now fitted for little else.”


I don’t know if you are fitted for little else but you surely have been condemned and it is time for you to retire into private life.


I rarely write politicians but when I do, it is because they have behaved badly while in office and every one of them I wrote to, either left politics on their own or were defeated at the polls but none of them reached their goals they had aimed for, to wit; becoming leaders of their parties or their governments.


Aside from ability, Canadians search for honesty in politicians and if honesty is found suspiciously lacking in a politician, that man or woman is considered unsuitable for office, and either voted out of office or put to such shame, that he or she leaves office on his or her own initiative.


In the days when Rome’s influence was at his peak, disgraced generals fell on their own sword. I don’t want you to fall on your sword. Simply pack up your things and slip out of Ottawa on your own in the dark of night and let those hopefuls running for the leadership of your party try to bring some credibility back to their party without you hanging around their necks like the albatross of the Ancient Mariner.


Trusting that you will act responsibly, I remain,


Yours truly




Dahn Batchelor


At the time of this writing, he is still running for leadership of his party.

Did this politician accept a bribe?

This letter was sent to a Toronto official who was accused of taking a bribe. At the time of this writing, (Sept. 2006) he is still running for the office of mayor of Toronto.The letter you will read was sent to him on September 11, 2003.



Tom Jakobek
2131 Lawrence Avenue E
Scarborough, Ont. M1R 5G4


Dear Mr. Jakobek:


Although I don’t live in Toronto, I conduct business there so in a way, what happens in Toronto concerns me.


Serious questions have been raised about your integrity and behavior. There is no need for me to elaborate as you are well aware of the allegations of wrongdoings that have been laid against you.


What concerns me however is that you have the termity to run for office as mayor of the City of Toronto. Do you honestly believe that you will be elected?


It never fails. Disgraced politicians seem to think that the public forgets. It isn’t going to happen. You are finished as a politician in Ontario.


If you continue to stay in the race, your moment of embarrassment will come when the polls close and the results become public. Quit gracefully. Don’t drag the word ‘politician’ deeper into the mud than it really is.


Alas, like many defeated losers, your last words in politics will probably be ‘that you tried to do your best for the general public.’ If you really care about the public, get out of politics and stay out.


Trying to repair the damage to your political career is about as pointless as trying to reinflate a rubber dingy when it has already been torn to shreds after having gone over the Niagara Falls.


Yours truly



Dahn Batchelor


I will keep you posted as his life progresses.

Politician tried to cheat volunteer

This is a letter sent to a politician who chose to hold back the pay of one of his volunteers on a technicality. He never told the volunteer that she would have to wait a year for the money before she offered her services to him.


David Senater 1745 Bathurst Street
Toronto, ON
M5P 3K5


Dear Mr. Senater:


All it takes is for one article in a newspaper to be published to destroy any hopes a would-be politician ever has of getting elected.


Years ago, a friend of mine was chosen to be the PC choice for his ward. He won the nomination in a landslide. The premier told him that if he were elected, he would be the province’s next attorney general. Two days later, a very small article was published in the Toronto Star in which he was accused of ripping off a customer. Within a day, his party withdrew his name and he never ever ran for office again.


Many years ago, another man who had successfully run for office for years on end was running again and an article was published about him taking money from an old woman’s bank account, a woman who subsequently died. His political career was finished permanently.

The alderman in my ward has just been convicted of taking a bribe. Do you really think that he will ever be elected in office again? Not in his lifetime.


Tom Jakobeck received bad press about alleged wrongdoings with respect to taking bribes. Do you really believe that he is going to win a seat on council?


We have all waited with baited breath to see whom the next clumsy oaf is that will stumble in the race and fall from grace.


The Toronto Sun wrote an interesting article about you in which it is alleged that you tricked a young university student into doing some canvassing for you on the promise that she would be paid $460 as soon as she was finished. She didn’t discover until it was too late that her payment wasn’t going to be coming to her for at least a year. Alas, the poor young woman didn’t realize that when you are dealing with most politicians, trust them not.


Your actions were bad enough but then you made three more colossal errors. First you said that you were a man of means and that was an outright lie. The second error was that you said that if the young woman’s mother hadn’t been rude to you, you would have paid off the young woman. That’s another lie. If you were going to pay the young woman for her services, you would have done it in the first place without being pressured into doing it. Third, you denied knowing that there was something on the form that said that she would have to wait a year before being paid. Another lie unless you are so stupid, you don’t even know what you are reading in your documents.


Never, ever lie to the press because when you do, you are lying to the public and the public doesn’t forgive liars.


Many years ago, before you were born, a encyclopedia company erroneously sold me a complete set for $99 instead of $999. When they were asked by a newspaper columnist why they wouldn’t honour the contract, they said that because they made a mistake, they didn’t have to honour the contract. I sued and the day before the trial, they settled and delivered to my home a new set of their encyclopedias. But what really cost them was their public statement that they didn’t have to honour their contract. I learned later that that remark by itself cost them $5 million dollars in sales.


You are quoted in the article as saying and I quote;


“If (Pinto’s mother) wrote me an apology for the way she treated me, I still might make the arrangement.” unquote


The young woman’s mother may have been abusive but your decision to use the word ‘might’ instead of ‘will’ is typical of politicians---they never really commit themselves to anyone. That statement alone will cost you your election to office.


It was Aristotle who said that Man is by nature, a politician. I think that the converse is more apt. A politician is by nature, an animal.”


It appears that one of your planks on your platform is, and I quote;


“Restore integrity to city hall.”


Your plank is rotting and when the main plank that is used to support the platform of a would-be-politician is rotten, the entire platform collapses.


I do owe you however. I have been working on a book called, “Stupidity and other Blunders” and in it I have an entire section dedicated to politicians who made stupid and clumsy mistakes. When writing about you, it will be under the heading, “Political wanabees who were finished before the finish”


If it wasn’t for your stupidity and others like you, I would never be able to write this book. Incidentally, I have written about some of the stupid things that I too have done in my life in this book. We all do stupid things in our lives but when politicians and wanabee politicians do stupid things, their careers come to an abrupt end. Didn’t your mother ever tell you that?


Don’t even think of suing me. You are a public figure and anyone can write their opinions about public figures as long as they don’t defame them. Writing about your stupidity is hardly defamatory especially when you act in a stupid manner. Truth is a defence to a suit for defamation.


Do the right thing. Apologize to the young woman, see that she gets her money forthwith and maybe, just maybe, the public may forgive you. Generally the public is willing to forgive someone who repents especially when they admit that they were wrong and then do what they can to correct the wrong. You could use your gaffe to shore up your rotting plank. It’s those who won’t bend that invariably end up as damn fools and no-one wants to elect another damn fool into office. We have enough of them in office already.


Yours truly



Dahn Batchelor

A letter to the Prime Minister of Thailand

Thailand's American-educated prime minister thought he could use capitalist tools and democratic elections to bask in a family sale netting 1.8 billion dollars, tax-free, amidst crushing demands that he resign. He resigned from office as a disgraced politician. The following letter was written by me to him a year before he resigned.

___________________________________________________________________________________
May 9, 2005

Thaksin Shinawatra Prime Minister of Thailand
Government House
Phitsanuloc Road
Bangkok, 10300
Thailand


Dear Sir:


When I attended the 11th UN Congress on the Prevention of Crime and Criminal Justice held in Bangkok in April, I was one of the persons who accepted your government’s offer to visit two of your country’s prisons. I wanted to see if the allegations in the Internet that stated that your prison system is a disgrace, had any validity to them. What follows is a sample of what I recently found written in the Internet.


Klong Prem Central prison was originally a temporary prison established in 1944, and later changed to a vocational training centre. In 1960 the prison was so overcrowded that the Interior Ministry established a temporary new prison within the same compound by dividing one part into a vocational training centre and the other part into the Lard Yao central prison. In 1970, the Interior Ministry separated the two prisons and the Lard Yayo was upgraded to Klong Prem Central and the old prison was renamed the Bangkok Special Prison.


Built in 1930's Bang Kwang is a Maximum Security Prison which holds inmates who are serving more than 25 years. Bang Kwang also holds prisoners whose appeals are pending in the Appeal Court and the Surpreme Court and Death Sentence Prisoners waiting for execution.


Overcrowding is an understatement as 20 or more inmates sleep side by side in small concrete cells with a bare bulb shining all night long. An open shit hole in the corner which all the men use. Origionally built to hold a few thousand inmates, it now holds over 8000.


Food consists of one meal a day of red rice in a dirty looking broth devoid of vegetables or meat. If you are lucky there may be a fish head or some other object with the promise of nutrition. Some resort to eating cockroaches, which swarm all over the place.


Punishment is common in Bang Kwang, from a random (and regular) whack with a cane to the wearing of leg shackles (denied by the prison authorities even when photos of leg shackles on prisoners are shown in the Internet). Beatings are common and are dispensed by guards and prisoners alike. Those poor souls unlucky enough to be put in the hole (solitary confinement) can spend months at a time in complete darkeness.
The hospital isn’t much better and those unlucky enough to end up there are usually there to die. TB, HIV, Hepatitus, along with disentry, fungal diseases, scabies and a host of other tropical diseases are common and can spread through the prison like wildfire. If you do fall sick (which is extremely likley) you have to pay for the medicine yourself. Most of the poorer inmates simply die. The pictures in the Internet (that were shown on Thai TV) show the prison conditions even more graphically.


That part of your country’s prison system that we who attended the 11th Congress were shown was the vocational training centre. Naturally I was impressed as were the other conferees. But being shown the vocational centre of your prison in Bangkok was not unlike being shown a beautiful woman in a bikini. What we were shown was most interesting. However, it was what was unseen that really tantalized my curiosity.


In 1999, Amnesty International stated on the Internet and I quote;

Prison conditions often constitute cruel, inhuman or degrading treatment, characterized by prolonged shackling in heavy chains, prolonged solitary confinement, and beatings for routine infractions of prison rules. Overcrowding and medical neglect are also ongoing problems. As a result of the economic downturn, prison conditions appear to have deteriorated further, including more overcrowding and a cut in food rations.


In 2001, Amnesty International in a report stated;


Torture and ill-treatment in prisons after people are tried and sentenced for criminal offences also occur in some cell blocks of prisons, which are under the control of the Corrections Department. Beatings and kicks are generally the form of punishment given to inmates on suspicion of breaking prison regulations. ''Trusties'', who are selected by prison officials for special privileges, are often the agents of such practices. Reports of ''trusties'' (also known as ''blue shirts'') beating prisoners with impunity are common. Such treatment occurred frequently in Building 2 of Lard Yao Men's Prison, Nonthaburi Province, on the outskirts of Bangkok. According to informed sources, Building Chiefs in prisons have almost complete power and in practice are not held accountable to the Prison Governor. Some of them are reported to be conscientious, but others permit torture and ill-treatment of inmates by prison guards and ''trusties''. Some also reportedly collect bribes on a regular basis from the prisoners for privileges, including sleeping space in a cell.


Naturally, I am curious as to whether much has changed since then.


I appreciate the fact that prisoners are not to be coddled (especially drug traffickers and murderers ) and that the prison experience should act as a deterrent but I think that your country should look to countries like Canada where we treat our prisoners in a more humane manner irrespective of their crimes.


My wife and I attended your reception and we were impressed with your speech. I chose however not to meet with you because of my fear that I would feel compelled to tell you of my concerns about the treatment of your prisoners and I didn’t want to say anything to you at that time that would spoil your evening. Hence, I am writing you instead.


As a person trained in criminal justice (as I too have been) you perhaps more than anyone else in Thailand can appreciate the need for improvement in your prison system.


If the treatment of prisoners in a country can be read as the barometer of civilization in that country, then unfortunately Thailand, a nation which is reknown as the country of smiles, has a barometer reading that is extremely low.
It is my fervent wish that some day, your Bang Kwang prison in Bangkok will appear to all who are invited to visit your prison system, ( and not just the façade ) as a beautiful woman and not as a decrepit old hag.


I remain,


Respectfully yours


Dahn Batchelor C.Crim. C.Fam. PLL


NOTE: He didn’t reply to my letter.

The Art of Writing Nasty Letters

Throughout the centuries, men and women have exercised their imaginations to their highest levels in speaking ill of one another. Some of the people who are maligned, really deserve what they get.


A sure way in relieving the tension built up inside of you when you see someone or hear of someone doing a wrong against you or another person, is to write that disagreeable person a letter that will surely upset him or her. This way, the tension built up in you, is transferred to that nasty person.


Most of us have that streak of malice within us which secretly delights us when we read about put-downs and we relish reading phrases that we wish we had used ourselves.


I also write nice letters but I won’t bore my readers with them but rather include some of my nasty letters in my blog for your amusement and as a work of reference.


Dahn Batchelor